Dear Mom by Kurt Attaway, MA, LMFTA

Dear Mom,

yellow flowerFirst, let me say, “Thank You!” In case you have not heard it today, I want to remind you that you have a significant impact on the ones around you. Second, let me encourage you to receive the “thank you.” Allow yourself to breathe deep the reality of your role. You are loving, caring, shaping, serving, laughing, crying, holding, cherishing, protecting, correcting and investing in your little one(s). Did I mention you are doing a great job?

As a son, father and husband, I have observed motherhood up close and personally. I see the investment, the fatigue, the worry, the hope, the celebrations and the seeming defeats. I know there are sleepless nights and sleepless weeks and sleepless years. There is endless work in the home and often work outside the home. Not to mention you might want to have at least one friend and an occasional night to relax. Does it seem like you are supposed to offer others the whole world while not losing your world? Quite the tall task if you ask me. Do everything. Be everything. Never make a mistake. Always smile. And do it all with grace and patience.

On this Mother’s Day, let’s celebrate you. Let’s acknowledge that every day is a chance to celebrate Mother’s Day because mothers serve and love daily (Yes, dads do as well, but this article is all about moms). Moms, with all the burden you carry for your family, I want to remind you to breathe. You deserve it. Find time to embrace your courage and strength. Make celebrating the simple things a daily habit.

Brené Brown, Ph.D., LMSW, a research professor at the University of Houston Graduate College of Social Work, highlighted motherhood as one of the most significant areas women feel shame1. How have we allowed this in our culture? I believe it is time for us to shift from shame to celebration. Motherhood is the result of life. Motherhood is a heart of love. Motherhood is a relationship to be celebrated.

yellow flower 2Tips for embracing more celebration:

• Celebrate daily: Identify successes every day. Share them at dinner time. Journal them before bed. Text them to a friend. Did the kids eat, did they get a hug, did you share a laugh? Count every success, especially the small ones.

• Find time to refresh: You need energy to celebrate. Make time to recharge and refresh. You care for your kids, make sure you care for yourself. Go for a walk, take time to journal, meet a friend for dinner, schedule time every month to reenergize who you are.

• Write notes to your child(ren): Taking time to encourage your child(ren) increases purpose and passion. Writing helps your focus and shapes your perspective. Writing notes gives a gift to your kid(s) and to your heart. This practice will help keep you focused on the big picture…loving well!

• Use the buddy system: Find others to share the journey with. Find a friend who encourages you. Find someone to encourage. This journey is too meaningful to experience alone.

We love and celebrate you mom!

1. Brown, Brené. Daring Greatly. New York: Gotham, 2012. Print.

Kurt leadershipAbout the Author: Kurt Attaway is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapy Associate in Texas. Kurt graduated with his Master’s from UHCL, where he was listed the top family therapist in his class. He values working cooperatively and collaboratively with his clients to help them take steps forward that bring greater expressions of life, hope and wholeness. Kurt works in private practice at The Center for Couples and Families, and serves as the Director of the WholeFit Leadership Team. Here he works with individuals and corporations to help increase the health and wellness of his clients mentally, physically, relationally and professionally.